John heywood

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More things belong to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. John Heywood The Proverbs of John Heywood (1546)
Sports do not build character. They reveal it.
Seven cities warred for Homer, being dead,/ Who, living, had no roof to shroud his head.
Men build bridges and throw railroads across deserts, and yet they contend successfully that the job of sewing on a button is beyond them. Accordingly, they don't have to sew buttons.
[Like this one a few years ago:] Hello, John, this is Eric Clapton, ... Love to do your song.